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Katie: Hello and welcome to the “Wellness Mama Podcast”. I’m Katie from wellnessmama.com, and wellnesse.com. That’s wellnesse with an E on the end. And this episode is all about “How to Sculpt Your Life, to be What You Envision.” I talk a lot about the physical side of health on here, but I’ve gotten an increasing number of questions and emails related to the mental health side, the emotional side, overwhelm, and everything that comes along with that. And so I wanted to have Paul on, because he is a personal friend with an incredible life story. But, online, he’s known as the personal discovery architect, and he’s a visionary and creator behind the Sculpting Your Life platform, which talks a lot about the powers of rituals and habits and mindsets, and how to use these to shift and make tangible changes in your life.
He has a process known as “Tuning In”, which we talk about on here for retraining your brain essentially, which over 3 million people worldwide have done. And we go through a lot of the things he talks about in this episode. A lot more of his information is available online, and that’s linked in the show notes at wellnessmama.fm. But, in this, we go into the mind traps we can all fall into, the direct way that our thoughts and beliefs affect our life, how to break our limiting beliefs, profound questions you can ask yourself that will help shift your mindset in your behavior over time, the reason things like I can’t believe are so powerful, his 7 steps for creating the shifts internally, a lot of about morning ritual and habits, and how to cultivate these over time, and how he uses multivariate resonance technology to help improve the brain, and so much more.
Paul is a fascinating guy. He’s absolutely full of love and very, very generous in sharing with you guys. I think, you will learn a lot from this. And I am always curious to hear your feedback so, please, leave a comment and let me know what you think. But I think you’ll enjoy this very entertaining and fascinating episode with Paul Hoffman. Paul, welcome.
Paul: Hello, how are you?
Katie: I’m so excited to chat with you. It’s always fun.
Paul: Good to see you. I know. I know.
Katie: And we get to record this one.
Paul: Absolutely. It’s been so long since the last time. I think the last time we met, we were at a sushi restaurant here in Marina del Rey. And now I get to spend some time with you. You are just an awesome human being, Katie. I mean, I love what you do. I love how you show up in the world. And I’m honored to be on this journey with you today.
Katie: Well, I feel the same way about you. And you have such an incredible…so many incredible stories of your life. And for anyone who isn’t familiar with you yet, I feel like probably everybody has heard one of your more famous jingles, which is the “Have you driven a Ford lately?” If I’m remembering correctly?
Paul: That’s right. Yeah.
Katie: Most people listening have heard that one. And I believe you also were Pink Floyd’s tour manager at one point.
Paul: I was, when I was very young. I was 24 years old when I was their tour manager. I worked for them for two years.
Katie: Wow. So, yeah, I feel like you’ve lived many lives in one lifetime already, and many more to come, probably.
Paul: I hope to. You know, my mom died at 104, Katie. All right? My grandmother died at 109. Okay, that’s the Italian side of my family. So, I tell all my friends, “Here’s the good news. The good news, I’m gonna be around a long time.” Then I say to all my adversaries, “Here’s the good news. I’m gonna be around a long time.”
Katie: Good genes, for sure on that one.
Paul: Yeah, there you go.
Katie: We’re always so inspiring to talk to you. And that was one of the reasons I was so excited to have you on here and let you inspire everybody listening. Like I mentioned, you’ve been through many, many… Like you’ve already learned and shared and built so much in your life. But I think the work you’re doing now is especially inspiring to me personally, and what I’m excited to really delve into today. So, for anybody who isn’t already familiar with it, you have a platform that delves into sculpting your life. And I would love if we could start broad, and you could just introduce us to that concept.
Paul: Absolutely. So, sculpting your life… So, the metaphor to sculpting your life… First of all, everyone, you know, anyone that’s walked in this Earth is a work of art. We’re all a masterpiece. Sometimes we just don’t know it. Sometimes we just don’t see it. Lots of times, we get in our own way so we can’t express it. But the truth of the matter is we are unique. There’s nobody on this planet, Katie, that’s like you. There’s nobody on this planet that’s like me, just like there’s no two rose petals, no two raindrops, no two snowflakes are the same. So, sculpting your life came out of a desire I had to really empower people to step into who they truly are. And so, the metaphor for sculpting your life is when Michelangelo, the great artist, looked at the block of granite many, many, many years ago, which was cracked, flawed, discolored, just like human beings, nobody wanted it, but he said, “I’ll take it,” because he saw David. And what he did was he took everything in the way out of the way, and there’s David.
So, if anybody that’s listening has ever seen the statue of David in-person, I have, it’s a magnificent piece of art. And it’s what each and every one of us as human beings are. So, I got into this whole thing, okay, what can I do and how can I really empower, and as I say, inspire people to step into who they truly are so they sculpt the masterpiece known as you? And that’s the overall reaching concept of sculpting your life. And I do it through the power of rituals, the power of habits, and the power of what I call mindsets of success. Because everything in your life happens from some kind of a thought, belief, idea that you’ve had. So, whatever mindset you’re in is going to create whatever shows up in your life. And the way to really create, as I say, mindsets of success is to wake up every day and focus in on what are you going to do today to show up in the power of who you are, and create an action plan so that by the end of your day, you have felt that you have actually shown up and inspired and empowered people to do the same thing.
And so, the idea of the rituals, and I have a very specific ritual I do every day, and the whole idea of habits. You know, there’s always two forms of habits. You know, there’s habits that are good for us. For instance, you know, obviously, this podcast that we’re doing now is a really good habit. It’s something, we’re sharing information, we’re connecting with each other, we’re hopefully gonna be able to transform people’s lives. And then there’s those habits that we do unconsciously, which aren’t really good for us, but we don’t really know because we’re not aware of what we’re doing sometimes.
So, the whole idea of being able to have a powerful ritual, powerful habits, and a mindset which really gets you to focus in on your strengths and who you are, I think is the most important thing in sculpting the masterpiece known as you. And so, you know, we all know that there’s limiting beliefs we all have, and we all know the speak that we all have in the personal development world, you know, which I guess I am in, although I do call myself a “personal discovery architect.” And when I say that, people go, “What the hell is that?” Well, the truth of the matter is, I’m the architect of my life. And in order for me to develop whatever I wanna develop in my life, I have to discover what it is that I wanna develop. So I just put the whole thing together, and that’s how I got to what I do. But again, you know, if you can really just give yourself the opportunity to choose… I always tell people choose in your favor. So, every time you make a choice in your life, make sure it’s in your favor. Now, that’s not an egotistical thing. That’s not something that’s, you know, self-serving, if you will. It’s really about standing in your power. Because unless you can stand in your power, you can’t stand in anybody else’s world and give them who the fullness of who you are. That was the long and short of it, but that’s kind of what it is.
Katie: That was a perfect jumping-in point. And I love that you talked about thoughts, beliefs, emotions, becoming, like, kind of really shaping your life. I think this is a concept I didn’t really understand for a long time. And I’ve talked about this before on the podcast, but I did all the work in physical health and fitness to try to heal and to get my body to a place of health. And it wasn’t until I addressed my thoughts and beliefs and emotions that that all changed. And my physical health drastically changed, and that was almost just a side effect. But until that point, I didn’t really understand, I hadn’t experienced just how profoundly that impact is. And I think this can be a little bit of a hard concept for a lot of people to understand. So, can we go a little bit deeper on what you mean by your thoughts and beliefs and emotions really having that really super profound impact on your life, and maybe some ways in which you can start to learn and shift those?
Paul: Absolutely. So, everything… So, I always tell people that life’s an either/or principle, Katie, okay? And it’s really simple. It’s not rocket science. Either you’re gonna do it or you’re not. Okay. So, say you have an idea that you wanna create something in your life, whether it’s a business, whether it’s a love relationship, whether it’s a personal relationship with yourself, whatever it might be, there’s always three forms to the idea. There’s the A, B, and C is what I call it. A is the idea, C is the outcome, right? B, the middle part, is the most important part of anything, because what happens in B will determine what you’re gonna do in your life. Because most people, when they come up with a great idea, oh, say, for instance, I’m gonna start a podcast, okay? Let’s just say somebody says that, okay?
The outcome is I wanna be able to interview people and transform lives, and so forth and so on. But most people, when they do that, if they don’t really know how to do it, they’ll say to themselves, “Well, I don’t know how to do that.” And then they will never do it. So, that’s a belief that they have. I call it a mind trap. So, a mind trap is a limiting belief, okay? And I’ve identified 10 mind traps that everybody has, scarcity, distractions and diversions, fear of failure, procrastination and perfectionism, I am not enough, I am unlovable, lack of responsibility and accountability, resistance to change, lack of commitment, and low self-esteem and confidence. And we all have them either all at once or in different forms. And so, the whole thing about being able to create this idea and say to yourself, “Well, I don’t know how to do that,” well, why don’t you flip that, and then why don’t you ask yourself this question? Any time you come up with something new, that’s gonna challenge you, that’s gonna really get you to look at your life and step into a new paradigm, ask yourself the following question. What do I need to do to make it happen?
And I’ll give you a great example. So, Katie, I’ve known you a long time. I admire your work. I remember where we met. We met a Jim Kwik’s mastermind many years ago, right? And I just saw Seth, your amazing husband, at Traffic & Conversions, and we were talking, and, you know, I said, “So, Seth, how do I get on Katie’s podcast?” So, what do I need to do to make it happen? He said, “We’ll just make it happen.” So that’s a great example of me being able to go, “Okay, you know what? I’m gonna ask for what I want, and either one of two things is gonna happen. Either I’m gonna get a yes or get a no,” okay? So, when people think about how to create what they wanna create in their life, if they’re not gonna willing to go out on the limb and challenge themselves, then they’re gonna stay in the status quo, what I call their storms of mediocrity, okay?
So, the idea of everything in your life… I call it… So, we’ve all heard the expression, your inner reality creates your outer circumstance. You know, that’s a classic PD saying that’s been around for many, many years. So, I’ve added a little bit of a twist to it. So I say that your invironment, that’s your I-N, your invironment, creates your environment. You’re E-N, right? And because what you put into your mind, what you read, what you watch, who you hang out with, what you listen to, all that stuff has a profound effect on your subconscious mind, so that what happens is, if you’re putting stuff in your mind that isn’t empowering, and it’s disempowering, what happens is you’re gonna have disempowering thoughts, and you’re gonna start to not really believe that you can have what you want, and what I call your ideal life.
And so, everything that happens in your life… First of all, this is a huge concept. It took me many years to get. I create everything that happens in my life, through some form of thought, some belief I have, some pattern that I allow to control my mind, or some trigger that triggers me to either give up on myself or push forward. And so, when you get really, like, down to the nitty-gritty of it, if you’re not willing to, or if you’re not willing to look at what is getting you in the way, or what is getting in the way of you having, as they say, your ideal life, then you’re not gonna change your life. And the most important thing that’s gonna help you change your life is changing your thoughts, beliefs, and ideas about what it is…what’s possible for you in life.
So, when you come up with an idea, or a thought, or a belief, that “I can’t,” well, then guess what’s gonna happen? I can’t. If you think you’re poor, then guess what? You’re poor. If you think abundant, then guess what? You’re gonna go into an abundant consciousness, and you’re gonna find abundance in your life. Because obviously, we live in an abundant universe. There is no lack and limitation here. The only lack and limitation that people believe are the ones they make up. Because we’re limitless. And so, that’s kind of my whole belief about that. So, I teach this, as I say, this concept about mind traps. You know, if you really take the time to tune in, you can really identify what’s holding you back in your life. But you gotta be willing to do it. And most people don’t wanna hear the outcome that their mind is gonna tell them, because the outcome is not gonna be in sync with whatever thought, belief, whatever, that they have. But the truth of the matter is, if you wanna change your life, I tell this to people all time, you wanna change your life, guess what? It’s really simple. Do something different. That’s it.
Katie: Yeah, it’s a hard truth to hear. And I resonate when you talk about this because I’ve said for a long time, I think we are the sum of the questions we ask ourselves. And it’s so much better to give our subconscious questions like “how can this happen?” and, like, open-ended creativity-based questions. But when you say, like, that we create everything that happens in our lives, I know we’re gonna have people push back on that. And I think I would have too at one point in my life. I would have said, “Well, no, I didn’t create my Hashimoto’s. This happened to me.” Or, “I didn’t create the sexual assault. That happened to me.” But when you actually really start unpacking it, like you said, you don’t necessarily love some of those answers that come up, but it’s so powerful. So, I’d love to go a little deeper on how do we start unpacking these limiting beliefs? How do we start making that inner shift toward things like abundance, or towards things like health, or peace, or wherever we want to go? What are some of those… Maybe, like, give us some specifics on how to start that process.
Paul: Well, okay, so, the first thing about it… So, I have this process. It’s called the tuning-in process. Okay? And, you know, I have a brain technology, Katie, that I think… I believe I’ve given you guys a couple of free tracks to whoever wants to sign up for it. But the truth of the matter, so, it’s all about, you know, a lot of people talk about meditation. We can get into that a little while later, but I call it tuning in. And so, the most important thing that you need to do is you need to do… There’s a three-step overall process to tuning in. And it’s about inquiry. Those are the questions you’re talking about. Inquiry. Okay? Ask yourself hard questions. When something doesn’t go your way, ask yourself, “Why didn’t it go my way and what was my part in it?” Okay? What was I thinking? What was I doing? What was I attracting into my life when I was trying to walk down this certain path, to have a certain outcome in my life? So, you want to have an inquiry.
You wanna then be able to discover where you are getting in your own way. Because the biggest obstacle to success, I don’t care what anybody tells you… I got hundreds of books all around me, about success, and mindset, and all that stuff. And I’ve nutted it all down to one very simple principle. That is, once you learn how to get out of your own way, then a plethora of opportunity opens up for you. Because the biggest obstacle to success is you. I don’t care what you tell me. You could play the victim, you could blame somebody else. But again, back to this whole thing where you create your own life, and you create everything that happens in your life by the consciousness that you’re in, in every moment of your day, then, which stands to reason, you have the ability to control your consciousness by how you think, what you believe, and how you show up around what’s going on in your life. And so, you know, a good example for me is… So, I like to tell people that everybody has a circle of brilliance, I call it. What is the circle of brilliance? Well, you’ve heard the expression that you’re the average of the five people you hang out with, right?
So, you know, I tend to hang out with really smart people, okay. Smarter than I am. And I’m not talking book smart. I’m just talking, you know, people that I can learn from. Because I’m an open book. I’m like a sponge, man. I’m trying to grab it all, right? And so, I call it your circles of brilliance, because I’m one of those kind of guys, and it gets me into trouble sometimes, I like to create my own language, okay? So, I call it a circle of brilliance. So, who is in your circle of brilliance? Who can you go to? Who can you hang out with that empowers you to actually look at your life from a whole different viewpoint? Because once you expand your viewpoint, then your life expands. Okay? And so, the whole idea of the seven-step tuning-in process, so, tuning is really simple. Have you ever… So, for those of you that have read the book “The Power of Now,” okay, which was one of my favorite books, but for one reason, okay, which was the concept that Eckhart Tolle came up with, which is called “The witness.”
Okay, so, what that means from that book is basically, once you can witness your life, so, you step out, okay, and look at your life. You witness what you’re doing, you witness your behaviors, you witness your thoughts, you witness how you show up, you witness who you hang around with. All that stuff gives a profound effect on the outcomes that are gonna happen in your life. So, the seven-step tuning-in process is about…first step is observe. Know where you are in your life. Second step is identify what’s holding you back. The third step is reframe those beliefs that sabotage you. Okay? Fourth step is pivot into a more empowering mindset. The fifth step is anchor an unstoppable belief in you. The sixth step is activate. Activate it so you now are operating from a frequency of possibility. And integrate, you simply start living it now. That’s it. And so, if you’re really stuck in your life, and you don’t know what your next step is, then, again, ask yourself the one question, what do I need to do to shift? Ask yourself, as you said, Katie, ask yourself these questions.
Why are the same things showing up? What is it about me… Because it’s about you. What is it about me that’s getting in the way of letting the magic of awe and wonder that’s all around you to become your normal? And the truth of the matter is it’s all about whether you think you’re smart enough, whether you think you have enough money, whether you think you know the right people. You know the whole what-ifs, okay? Everybody’s got what-ifs. And then there’s the what-ifs, the I can’ts, the I should haves, and then someday I will. And you know that someday is not a day of the week, by the way.
Katie: I love that phrase so much. Yes.
Paul: Right? And I didn’t come up with that. I think… I mean, I read that. Do you know Sam Warren?
Katie: Yes. I love her.
Paul: Yeah, I think that was her book title, right? But the truth of the matter is is that, again, everything in your life is really a direct result of some thought that you’ve had. So when you wake up in the morning, when I talk about rituals, when you wake up in the morning, I spend the first hour of my day on me, okay? I don’t look at this until I finish my ritual. So, my morning ritual is all about… I mean, I can give you a real quick synopsis, it’s, I wake up in the morning, I drink a beautiful glass of water, because I need to hydrate. Because, you know, when you’re in your sleep state, you’re dehydrated, because your body’s doing its digestive stuff and all that stuff. Drink a great glass of water. Then, I look at the ceiling, before I get out of bed, and I pray. And I thank God, because I pray to God, okay? I’m not a religious person. I’m a spiritual person, but I call it God. I pray to God, and thank God for another day for me to show up in my power, and be able to get out of my own way. That’s my prayer in the morning.
And then I do a gratitude exercise. I’m grateful for three people. And I’m part of… You know Jeff Hays. Who I spoke to today, said to say hi to you. So, Jeff created an app called Gratitapp, G-R-A-T-I-T-A-P-P. It’s a free app. I’m his partner in it. And it’s a gratitude app. Because when I do my gratitude exercise, in the mornings, I used to just write in my gratitude journal. So, I’d write in, you know, one of my journals, and I got tons of them. I’d write in my gratitude journal about, I’m like, you know, who I’m grateful for. And I’d pick three people. And then, you’d never see it, because it’s in my journal. I’m not gonna send this to you, right? So, Jeff came up with this idea of Gratitapp, which is basically an app where you wake up in the morning, you open the app, and then three people show up. Right? And if you like them, great, if not, swipe, and then you can grateful for three people and then you send it. So that’s my gratitude exercise.
And then I read three books, okay? Every morning. I read 365 days of “Think and Grow Rich,” 365 days of “7 Habits of Highly Effective People,” and I read a book called “The Art of Living,” by a guy named Epictetus, whose was around when Aristotle and those cats were, right? And I read those three books every day. So, obviously, today I read, you know, October 25th, in “Think and Grow Rich” and “7 Habits.” And then, with the other book, I just kind pick it up, flip through some pages, and it always ends on the right page. And then from there, what I do is, I listen to my 15 minute good morning, great day sculptation, it’s called. That’s my brain technology, which I’ve had a little more than 3 million people download. And it’s basically me talking to me, and talking myself into having a successful day, right?
And it’s really cool stuff. It’s using binaural beat, heartbeat, and breathing patterns. I call it multivariant resonant technology. It’s really powerful, and it really works. And then, what I do after I do that is I’ll play with my animals, okay? I have two beautiful cats. I used to have two dogs and two cats. I have two beautiful cats. I play with my animals, because they teach me unconditional love, all right? So, I wanna be in a space of love. And then, I walk around in my house and on my deck, and I talk to my plants. Now, people think I’m crazy. I am. But plants are very, very powerful, right? And then, from then, the last thing I do after I finish all that, Katie, is I sit down, and I write. And I write this thing every morning. You can go to my Facebook page, Paul Hoffman, facebook.com Paul Hoffman profile. And I write this thing every morning called “Good morning, Great Day.” And it’s a very inspiring thought that I write, actually, for myself, but a lot of people love it, and it’s really about setting your day up, right?
And I’m actually putting them in a book, finally. I mean, it’s taken me a long time. See, one of the things, and I’ll get into that in a minute, one of the things is, sometimes I procrastinate, ladies and gentlemen, but that’s okay. That’s okay. Now I’m learning to not procrastinate. But there’s a whole thing around that. And then, so I write this… So, I’ve got about 1,000 of them. So now, I’ve started to edit them, and I’ve got now 90 of them edited. And for another, probably, another month and a half, I’ll have 365 of them, and I have a publisher that’s interested in them. And I’m gonna put a book out called “Good Morning, Great Day,” you know, “365 Days of Wisdom,” or whatever I’ll call it.
Then, from there, the next thing I’ll do is I’ll practice what I call nutritionising. Okay? So, I juice every day. I make my smoothies every day. I make my “it’s all good” water. Did you get the “it’s all good” bites by the way? Okay. “It’s all good” water. And then I will go out and… So, the juice, smoothies, the water, and then what I’ll do is I’ll do a very short spiritual prayer again, and then that’ll take me about an hour. It takes me about an hour for my day. And then I go out and I work out for two hours. So, I’m up at 5:00, 5:30. So, my routine is usually over, give or take, 6:30, 7:00, my morning routine, and then I’ll do a two-hour workout. So, by that time, it’s around 9:30, maybe 10:00, I’m ready to rock. I’m ready to, like, go out there and just tackle the day, okay? And I think that it’s so important for people to understand, again, going back to what we were talking about, Katie, that whole idea of you set yourself up every day for success. You determine what it is that you wanna do in your life, you know, because what you do today actually is gonna determine what you’re gonna do tomorrow. But if you’re not really conscious of what you’re doing, then you’re walking around unconscious.
I mean, I don’t know any other way to say it. I mean, those of us that walk around unconscious, and I used to do that, by the way, quite a bit, then I’m missing out on all the magic that’s seeking my attention. So, again, the concept that we create everything that happens in our life, like you say, Katie, is kind of like… It’s one of those kind of concepts, now… I don’t know, man. That’s a hard one to grab onto. But the truth of the matter, it is. Now, listen, there’s crazy things that happen in life, of course. You know, but you don’t wanna put yourself in situations where harm comes your way or whatever. But the truth of the matter is when you really are conscious, and know what you wanna do in your life, you know, because you know where you are, then you’re at least giving yourself an opportunity to shapeshift your destiny, and create, you know, the perfect day.
Okay, now is everything perfect? No, because if everything was perfect, there’s another caveat here, if everything was perfect, you’d have nothing to work on. Okay? The truth of the matter is, man, it’s fun to work on your life if you make it fun. But if you’re gonna be trudging through it, man, you know, it’s crazy. But, you know, everybody has the gift in themselves to have anything that they want in their life. And again, you know, I understand circumstances. I get all that stuff. Listen, I had a $2,500 a week cocaine habit, for many, many, many years, folks, okay? I was put in a straight jacket, okay? I was sent to the 14th floor psych ward of St. Vincent’s Hospital. Okay? This is after I’m making millions of dollars in the jingle business, and sabotaging myself. So, I’m qualified to talk about this stuff. Truth of the matter is, man, just get out of your own way, and allow who you truly are to blossom, and to come out.
Because, you know, there’s… And I always talk about this, and this has to do with procrastination, too. It’s so easy to procrastinate, because there’s always two forms to an excuse, all right? There’s the excuse you make, okay, which gives you permission to not do something, whatever. But then… So, the excuse you make that gives you that permission, and then there’s the excuse you make for the excuse, which then becomes your reality. So, I’m always about trying to discover, uncover, and discard all the stuff that’s kind of like in my own way. And I’ve been around this planet a long time, and I’m gonna keep being around it for a lot longer, because as I told you, my mom died at 104, my grandmother died at 109. I’m gonna be around a long time. But I take care of myself because I have a zest to live life. I have a zest to really go out and really empower people to truly, you know, unleash their gift, unleash the treasure of who they are. Because we’re all a treasure, man. We’re all a masterpiece. We’re all a piece of, a work of art, which is why I always say, you know, if you learn how to create the proper rituals, and the habits, and the mindsets, then you get to sculpt the masterpiece known as you. And there’s nobody like you. I don’t know if that answered it, but that’s my story. I’m sticking with it.
Katie: It absolutely did. And I’m glad you brought up a little bit of other parts of your story as well, because I think maybe people listening could easily think, well, of course, this guy can do all this because he has had all these cool careers and businesses, and probably life has been probably easy for him throughout all of this. So I’m glad you shared some of your own ups and downs that you’ve had, and now the perspective on being on the other side of that. Did those shift your mindset in certain ways throughout those different challenges and experiences? Like, I know, for me, looking back, the harder times in my life actually became some of the most impactful times in my life, in a very positive way, now. But in the moment, of course, it didn’t quite seem like that. How did those really profoundly impact your life when you came out the other side of them?
Paul: Well, that’s a great question, and thank you for that. So, anybody ever hear about what’s called the imposter syndrome? You heard about that, right? So, I had the imposter syndrome, and I still have bits and pieces of it, folks. So, you know, I’m a self-taught musician and composer. Okay? So, I can play enough to be dangerous, okay? I’m not a great singer, but I put myself out there. But, you know, I’ve mastered my craft, let me put it to you that way. And so, when I say I have an imposter syndrome, so, I’ve been around very, very famous people in my life. Okay? And I’m not a stargazer. But the point I’m trying to make here is that when I was in the jingle business, and I was making millions of dollars, and I was snorting $2,500 a week of cocaine, and I was on top of the world, and I was being interviewed by CBS, and NBC, and CNN, all this kind of stuff, if you will, it’s only just stuff, I would be doing jingles that, you know, I’d be in the studio. I’d write this thing. And then I go in and I’d have an arranger take my composition and arrange it, whether it be for strings and horns, or rhythm section, whatever it might be. And the people that would play on my jingles were people that you probably know who they are.
So, if anybody ever watched the “David Letterman Show” when it used to be on, his band, the Letterman band, was guys that played on my jingles, okay? Michael Bolton used to sing my jingles, okay? Luther Vandross used to sing my… I mean, so all these people would sing my jingles. And every time they’d come into the studio, I would think they’d look at me like I was a phony, because I never studied music, you know. And these guys who’d like, you know, consummate musicians. Like, the string players I used to hire used to be, you know, were Juilliard graduates, and they were playing in the New York Philharmonic, okay? So, I would always think that they would think I was, like, a fraud. And that went on for years and years and years.
And then when I got into, what I do now, the whole teaching area of what I do, I mean, I got into it very simply by, there was a guy named T. Harv Eker. I don’t know if you knew who he was, okay, Peak Potentials. So, I went to his event. And he invited me, it was called The Millionaire Mind Intensive. Three-day event. Great Teacher. Basically, he taught you about, you know, how to change your money blueprint. So, if you think poor, then you’re poor. If you think abundant, you’re abundant. But anyway, again, it’s all consciousness. So, I sat there for three days. It was my first experience in the personal development world. He comes up to me after the event, and he says, “Hey, so, what do you think, bro? What do you think?” I said, “Harv, you’re a really good teacher, man. Your music sucks.” He’s said, “What do you mean my music sucks?
So, I say, “Well, Harvey, you know, I’m sitting here for three days, and all you play is popular songs about money that you think fit into your principles, but they don’t. And so, what if you had your own song?” He said, “Well, how would I do that?” I said, “I’ll write it for you.” So I wrote him a song called, “I’ve got a Millionaire Mind.” Okay? And then he said, “Okay, man, this is great. Can you write songs for all my courses?” and then Jack Canfield called me, and Mark Victor Hansen, and Brendon Burchard, and Alex Mandossian, and the list goes on. And I created this company called Success Songs, where you can go to it now and you can get a song for free. But anyway, the point is, is that then I said to Harv one day, I said, “Harv, you know what, man? I wanna start speaking on the stages,” because I had this deep, deep desire to really change people’s lives. Because as I teach, Katie, I’m learning. Because I teach what I need to learn. You know, we’ve all heard that expression, right? And so, I said to Harv, “Man, I’d love to be able to speak on your stages.” He said, “Well, what would you speak about?” I said, Well, I’d speak about rituals, habits, and mindset.” And I, you know, went over the whole story about, like, I’m telling you, and he said, “Great, let’s do it.” So he booked me on the stages, then all of a sudden, all these other people started to call me, and yet I still thought that I was a fraud.
Because I don’t… You know, I’ve read all the stuff, but, you know, I always tell people there’s no original ideas. There’s no original ideas. There’s just your interpretation, which is original, by the way, but it’s your interpretation of an idea. Right? So, when I say, you know, you’re inner reality creates your outer circumstance, I mean, Jim Rohn, I think said that, you know, John Maxwell said that. All these people have said that, right? And I just, I talk about it differently. I said, “Well, your invironment creates your environment.” Right? And then finally, at one point, I just woke up one day and I said, “You know, Paul, why don’t you stop getting in your own way? Why don’t you get out of your own damn way, and just go out and put it out there, man? Just be authentic. Just be authentic. People will respond.” Okay? And that’s kind of what happened.
But I’ll tell you what, I can still go in my recording studio, and I’ll write a song. I’m actually gonna… I’m working on an idea now for something. But I will tell you, the first thought I have in my head when I sit down at my keyboard, right, and remember, I’m not a great player, but I sit down on my keyboard, right, the first thought I have my head is like, “nobody’s gonna like this.” That’s the first thing I… I’m telling you the truth. And then finally, it’s like, wait a minute, bro. I catch myself. Wait a minute. Okay. Listen, man, 3 million people have listened to my stuff. I’ve made millions of dollars with my music. I think I’ve been successful in my music business. So get out of your own way and just go for it. And that’s kind of how it is. And everybody on this call, and everybody that’s in your tribe, Katie, which is a powerful, powerful group of people, man, because you show up. I mean, you are light. You really are. And that’s why I wanted to be on this course, because I wanna get some of your light, my dear. I wanna get some of your light. But the truth of the matter is, man, it’s like, you know, if you just take a deep breath, slow down, and just breathe in the truth of who you are, you can let go of all that negative stuff. You can let go of all those mind traps that you think are your truth.
The only truth that you have is the truth that you believe, about you. And if you don’t think you can do it, then figure out a way to do it. Okay? But don’t give up on yourself, because giving up is not an option. It’s just not an option. Because if you give up, you stay in the same place that you’ve been, in the same place, in the same place. And then, just, it’s like a hamster wheel. You’re going around and around and round. So, I’ve learned that, okay, I might not be the smartest guy in certain things. I know a lot of stuff, I know a lot of people, I’ve had great success, in spurts, not spurts. I’ve made millions and lost millions, by the way. Okay? And made it again. But this is not about the money. The money is only energy. Money is only energy. It’s what you do with the money that’s important. Okay? And so, at the end of the day, I finally just said to myself, “You know what, man? Why don’t you just put it out there? Put yourself out there and let the universe guide you.”
Because if your universe knows this is important, guys, if the universe knows that you’re ready, it will give you whatever is necessary for you to have whatever you want in your life. But if the universe feels you’re not ready, it won’t give it to you. Because the universe isn’t screwing around here. And the universe wants powerful people on this planet, inspiring people so that the world works for everybody, so that…this is a… We live in a world… And the world’s crazy right now, as we all know. There’s crazy stuff. And, you know, politics, I’m, just not my thing. But there’s just crazy ideas going on around the world. But the truth of the matter is, you don’t have to buy into any of that stuff. All you need to do is show up. That’s all. Just show up.
Katie: And I feel like maybe an important piece I’d love to touch on, you’ve touched on this a little bit, but it’s the idea of how to direct the active mind. Because I think a lot of people maybe feel like thoughts and emotions are just things that happen to us. And making the shift, and learning how to direct that, I feel like it’s very pivotal for all these things we’re talking about. So, if someone maybe feels like they’re in a place of, “well, I just have these emotions, I have these thoughts, they happen to me,” how can they start to learn to direct the active mind?
Paul: Good question. The truth of the matter is that nothing happens to you. Let me just start there. Nothing happens to you. You create what happens. So, it doesn’t happen to you. You create what happens. And so, your mind is active. And so, I teach… You know, one of my brands is called “Sculptations,” and it’s a brain technology. Okay? And so, I take binaural beats, heartbeats, and breathing patterns. I put it together. I call it multivariant resonant technology, okay? I’ve had a little more than 3 million people download it, and I write all the music. It’s all really cool. I do the visualization over it, which I call mind sculpting. And I take you on a journey. Okay? But the truth of the matter is, is that your mind is always going to be active, because your mind is always looking for what you’re placing into it.
So how do you direct your mind? Just be mindful about what you’re putting in it. Okay? And so, when most people say, you know, man, you know, I’m gonna just sit down and meditate and quiet my mind, my first thing, here’s my first response to that, Katie, is good luck. Good luck, you know. And if you learn how to do that, please let me know. Because your mind is not designed to be quiet. Your mind’s designed to be active. But your mind, if you know how to learn how to direct it, and control it, by what you put into it, I mean, that’s as simple as it gets, believe me, then what happens is you can direct that active mind to be active in the direction that you want it to go. But if you don’t know what you want, and if you’re floundering because you’re unsure…and by the way, that’s okay. Because, you know, it takes discipline, determination, and commitment to really figure out what it is that you want in your life, because the first thing you need to know in life is what do you want? Then you need, gotta know, why do I want it? Okay. And then the third thing is, what do I want? Why do I want it? And the third thing is that question I said, what do I need to do to make it happen? But your active mind is always gonna be active. You know, it’s the whole fight or flight. We all know about this stuff, okay?
But if you’re not able to understand where you are in your life right now, where’s your sweet spot, then what happens is, is that you’re gonna be…you’re bombarded with all this stuff. That’s why when I start my day, Katie, and I don’t look at this damn thing… Because see this right here? This is a freaking addiction. Okay? Because life is an addiction. You call it whatever you want. It’s not just drugs and alcohol, believe me, okay? But if you’re going to give your power over to something outside of you, game over. You’ve lost the day. Okay? And so, to really discover what it is that you want, it takes a strong mindset, and a belief in your ability to have what you want. And then when you tune into your active mind, if you tune in with the right questions, as you brought up, which is a great, great, great concept, which everybody should practice, by the way, and I’m not that great at it, sometimes I am, but then what happens is you’re giving your active mind, because your active mind’s always seeking activity. It wants to know where you want it to go. That’s how your mind works.
So, if you can direct your mind, then you can take it anywhere you wanna take it. If you can’t direct your mind, guess what? Your mind is gonna take you where it wants to take you, by the emotions. You know, first of all, it’s very important to check in with your emotion, and check in with your feelings. Now, when I was snorting $2500 worth of cocaine, you know, a week, it was like, you know, my emotions and feelings were all over the freaking place. And that was my comfort. So I go, you know, just, whatever. It was my comfort to do that kind of stuff. Obviously, it wasn’t good for me, and I knew it wasn’t good for me, but you know what? I was still… I had all these other things going on, the imposter syndrome, you know, relations.
I remember, you know, one time, Katie, when I stopped doing cocaine for a minute, okay? I haven’t done cocaine in over 30 years, and I never will again, thank God. But remember, I went to a rehab, right? I went to four rehabs, by the way, folks. And each one of them had a profound effect on me. And finally, the last one got me to stop doing what I was doing, which was a destructive behavior. But I remember, you know, the second rehab I went to, it was an outpatient program. I went to see the doctor, and we had to take a urine test. I walked in, and he said, “You know, by the way, your urine’s dirty, man.” I said, “Yeah, I know.” He said, “Why did you slip?” They called it a slip. I said, “Well…” I blamed it on my girlfriend. It was her fault. She didn’t put the spoon in front of my nose. She didn’t go buy the cocaine. She didn’t do any of that stuff. But it was her fault that I snorted.
You see, so, when you start to deflect and do that kind of stuff, then you’re certainly not directing your mind the way you want it to go, but you’re actually letting your mind play games on you. And so, you’ve gotta be really, really, really focused and attentive to what’s going on. But if you think you’re gonna stop and quiet your mind, then I would suggest go live in the Himalayas, look at a tree for 40 years, and you might be able to quiet your mind. But if you wanna live a life that’s full of possibility, full of opportunity, full of showing up in the power of who you are, then you’re gonna be active, and move in the direction that you wanna go. And when one door closes, another one’s getting ready to open. When you say no to something, you’re saying yes to something else. And at the end of the day, if it’s really not going the way you wanna go, practice my favorite word, which is “next.”
“What’s happening? This isn’t happen… Next.” Because I’m telling you, the universe is there for you. The universe is there for you. It’s a very spiritual concept. I understand that, and I know everybody here believes it. Okay? But the universe is there for you, provided you give the universe the reason for it to be there for you. That’s kind of my… That’s my story. I’m sticking with it. You know, and I don’t put myself in situations anymore where I’m challenged in ways by toxic energy. And you know what that looks like, Katie, and I’m sure a lot of your listeners do, too. You know, so, I remember, I had a buddy of mine, years and years ago, and he’s since passed away, but this guy would give me the shirt off his back. I mean, this guy, his name is Marty. God bless you, Marty. May you rest in peace, bro. He was an amazing human being. But Marty was one of the most negative people I ever met in my life.
And so, every time I’d say to Marty, say, “Marty, how you doing, man?” He’d go through this tirade, five minute tirade, about how his life sucked, right? And yet, guy’s driving a nice car. He’s got all the trappings, if you will. He just didn’t have this. He just didn’t have the right mindset. And so, finally, one day, Katie, I said to Marty, “Marty, I love you, bro. I cannot hang out with you anymore.” Because I don’t want that energy. I don’t want that stuff around me, because that affects who I am, that affects how I think, that affects the beliefs that I have, and that chips away at the belief and the confidence that I’ve created in my life, which has taken me years to do. And that’s okay it’s taken me years to do, because it’s my journey, all right, and I own it. But everybody’s got a different journey. And so, you know, I tend to just… I don’t hang around with negative people, I don’t put myself in toxic situations, and I control my destiny. And some days, I don’t like the way it looks, Katie. I will tell you that. But you know what? This too shall pass.
Katie: Yes, every storm runs out of rain. I remind myself that. When things seem tough.
Paul: There you go. The sun’s always shining folks, even when it’s cloudy.
Katie: Exactly.
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And I knew our time would fly by, as I knew it would, and a couple… I wanna make sure we have time for my last few questions that I love to ask. And the first being, three things that people either don’t know or misunderstand about your area of expertise.
Paul: Okay, so I’m gonna go back to… And I gave this some really great thought, because they’re really great questions, Katie. You are a rock star, young lady. Okay. So, the first one is about, you know, meditating, okay. So, most people think there’s a right or a wrong way to meditate. There is no right or wrong way to meditate. That’s not what it’s about. And meditation is just tuning in. You’re tuning in to your active mind, so you go on an intentional search for what you seek in your life. So, it’s not about sitting… Okay, you can sit there, you can walk around and meditate, you can do whatever, but if you’re looking for a specific outcome, then make sure the intention that you set for the tuning in has an intentional outcome. Because intention is a very important part of it.
So, it’s nothing about, you know, am I doing it right? Am I doing it wrong? So, I think that’s a big misconception. So, I think most people sometimes will sit down and try to meditate, and after 2 minutes, or after 5 minutes, or after 10 minutes, or after whatever, they’ll say, “Well, geez, I didn’t get anything.” Well, maybe that’s what was supposed to happen. You weren’t supposed to get anything. How about that? Whatever. It’s a practice. It’s a practice. It takes a practice to be able to tune in to your active mind. Okay, how long did it take you to learn how to ride a bike? It was a practice. Okay, so you gotta practice it every day. Put it in your success toolkit, and do it the way you wanna do it. There’s lots of different ways to meditate. I call it tuning in. There’s the seven-step tuning in process. I take you through a journey, observe, identify, reframe, pivot, anchor, activate, and integrate. Okay, that’s one thing.
The second thing is, you know, most people don’t understand, they play the victim and they play the blame game. And like you said, you know, why is this happening to me? Why it’s happening to you is because you’re attracting it. Because of where your consciousness is. That’s why it’s freakin’ happening to you. Okay? So, most people don’t understand, the biggest obstacle to success, whatever it looks like to you in life. I’m not talking about monetary success, or if that’s what it is that you want, is you. So get out of your own freakin’ way. So that your invironment is a vibrational match with your environment, and then you’ll be able to attract and manifest the ideal life you desire. Because only you hold the key that unlocks your gift. That’s the second thing.
The third thing is there’s always two forms to an excuse. It’s one of my favorite… I love talking about excuses. Right? There’s the excuse you make that gives you the permission to put off something and make the excuse. And, you know, I mean, I don’t know how many times, Katie, in my life, I went into… You know, I need to clean the garage, whatever it might be, okay? Okay, I’m sorry, I need to work on this program I’m doing, but I’ll always find something else to do instead. Now, why do I do that? Because I have some fear of wanting to do what I’m supposed to do. So I’m very mindful of what my mind traps are. Okay? And it takes practice. But there’s always two forms to an excuse. The excuse you make, and then there’s the excuse you make for the excuse. Okay? And then that becomes your reality.
So, if you wanna continue to make excuses for who you are, go right ahead. Okay? The universe will not listen to you. It will start putting stuff in your way that will make you trip up, and eventually get into understanding that you create your life. You create your life. I have this expression I always say, which is, “life is what you make it.” So pay attention to how you show up for you, because the biggest thing about… If you don’t show up for you in life, you can’t show up for anybody. Because it’s you that attracts who you wanna attract in your life. It’s you that attracts the circumstances that you put yourself into. It’s you that will attract the success you want. It’s you that’s sending out this waveform of energy and frequency that comes back to you in the form that you send it out.
So, if you wanna send out that your life sucks, you know what’s gonna come back? Your life sucks. Excuse my language. So, again, those are the three things that I practice every day. I mean, I have them all over my house. You know, I have another great quote in my house, which was by Edison. He said, “I didn’t fail…” You know, he tried to invent the light bulb. But I think Tesla invented the light bulb anyway. But anyway, it doesn’t really matter. But Edison said, “I didn’t fail 10,000 times.” when he tried 10,000 ways to do this, he said, “I just found 10,000 ways not to do it.” Now, think about that, folks. It’s a practice. The first time out of the gate, you might hit a home run, but maybe not. So you gotta learn how to hit curveballs. You gotta learn how to hit softballs. You gotta learn how to hit fastballs. You gotta learn how to get out of your own way. And that’s the important part.
Katie: I love it. And lastly, I think you’re gonna have a great answer to this one, but if there’s a book or a number of books that have had a profound impact on your life, and if so, what they are and why.
Paul: Okay, so I’ve got seven books. I thought about this, Katie. Because I got hundreds of books all around me, and I love them all, right? And I’ve actually not read them all cover the cover, but I’ve read at least one page in all of them. Right? So, there’s a book called “The Kybalion,” K-Y-B-A-L-I-O-N. It’s about hermetic philosophies, okay? It’s old Egyptian stuff, right? But it’s about universal principles and universal laws. It’s a great book. Then there’s a book called “The Untethered Soul,” by Michael Singer. Okay? There’s a book called “Habits” by Charles Duhigg. I’ve probably read every book out there on habits, okay, because I teach habits. Then there’s a book on Mindset by Carol Dweck. Okay. Then there’s a great book by this guy named Ray Dalio, who’s a… He’s in the financial world. He has a book called “Principles,” which is a really, really good book. And it’s about life principles and how he translates his principles to his work, right? And then, of course, “7 Habits of Highly Effective People,” by Stephen Covey, and “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill. You can’t go wrong reading that book. And those are the books that I…they’re all around me. I mean, I’ve got them right here. All I gotta do is go like this. They’re on my fingertips, all the time, because I get something out of them all the time.
Katie: And lastly, any parting advice, or where people can find you to keep learning from you?
Paul: You can find me, if you go to the post office, you can see my picture… No, I’m only kidding. I’m only kidding. I’m on the most wanted list. People say that to me, “Where did I meet you, Paul?” I say, “It could have been at the post office. You might have seen my picture in there. You know, it’s on the FBI’s most wanted list, but maybe not.” You can reach me at sculptingyourlife.com, sculptingyourlife.com, which will then take you to my other products and brands. I’m not trying to sell anything, but you can always download some stuff for free. My email, my personal email, everybody, is [email protected] Now, if you’re afraid to send me an email because you have a question, that’s on you. But if you have a question, you can email me, and guess what? I will get back to you. Okay? You can say in the subject line, “Heard you on Katie’s podcast.” Okay?
And the third thing, how you can get in touch with me, guess what? Ready? My cell phone. It’s 323-810-5588. Now, you can call me or text me anytime you want. And guess what? If I don’t answer the phone, I’ll call you back. Because I’m here to serve. Okay, Katie’s audience, I wanted to be on this podcast… I love what she does. I love her energy. I love her frequency. I love how she’s out in the world up-leveling and uplifting people. And I wanna be uplifted too by her. And you know what? I’m just grateful and thankful that she said yes to me being on here and me spewing my whatever. But yeah, if you’ve got a question for me, let me know what’s going on, because as Katie said at the beginning of this thing is like, “When you ask good questions, you get great answers.” And so, if you’ve got a question that maybe I can help you with, I’m here to support you. Don’t worry. I’m not gonna ask for your credit card. I don’t care about your credit card. I’m here to help and serve you, because each and every one of you is a masterpiece. And it’s time that you sculpt it the way that you want to, because life is what you make it. So don’t let anybody ever tell you differently, and especially don’t let this up here tell you differently.
Katie: Wow. I think you might be the first guest to give out a personal cell phone number, and I’m sure people will take you up on that, so you’ll probably hear from some of the people listening today. That is a very generous offer, Paul.
Paul: Absolutely.
Katie: And I will make sure to include links to all the resources you mentioned, and to some of my favorite jumping-in points, so people can keep learning more from you online as well, because you’ve published so much and have so many resources there. But as always, it was a pleasure to chat with you. I know that you balance many things in your life, and I appreciate you taking the time to be here today, and share so much of your story. So just thank you.
Paul: Thank you. And thanks for having me, Katie. This is very exciting for me. I was looking forward to this, man. It’s just… This is why I do what I do. And this is why I hang around people like you. And so, if this is any indication for all the listeners out here of how to do it, this is how to do it.
Katie: Oh, thank you for being here so much. And thanks to all of you guys as always, for listening, for sharing your most valuable resources, your time, your energy, and your attention with us today. We’re both so grateful that you did, and I hope that you will join me again on the next episode of the “Wellness Mama Podcast.”
If you’re enjoying these interviews, would you please take two minutes to leave a rating or review on iTunes for me? Doing this helps more people to find the podcast, which means even more moms and families could benefit from the information. I really appreciate your time, and thanks as always for listening.
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